I heard this song while I was coming back to Cedarville from The PEER Center: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o9HUV2ZKWJw
I have a problem identifying a “home”. If you want to send me mail, my address is to Custodial Services at the University where I work. I pay rent to live at another address. The home where I grew up is in PA. My mom lives at another address in PA. So, where is my “home”? I thought as I was leaving The PEER Center that in some ways I was leaving a “home” of sorts. This can be confusing when anytime I leave to go somewhere I say I am going home.
I sleep in Cedarville. It has also been a place of significant growth. I lived in Butler, PA for 18 years. I find support, understanding and acceptance at The PEER Center. All of these places thus qualify as a “home”.
Maybe I am crazy to want to define “home” as one specific place. It’s just when I listen to the song “Homesick” by Mercy Me, I long for the home that it describes. I get that the song may be referring to heaven, but I am talking about a home on earth. Where is it exactly that I belong?
I epitomize being a 20-something trying to figure out who I am, where I am going, and what in heavens name I am going to do with my life. I am in this transition summer. I have this deadline in two months where I have to find an apartment somewhere and a job. Yet, I have a job and I have a place to stay now.
I am torn between setting down roots and connecting with those around me and the knowledge that I intend to move in two months. But, I feel that still small voice telling me to bloom where I am planted. What’s with God asking the person who struggles to build relationships for fear of abandonment to build relationships where I know I will be the one leaving?
While I was thinking about the song “I’m Going Home” by Chris Daughtry, I came to the conclusion that maybe “home” is right where the Lord and I are at, at any given moment. Maybe “home” is being satisfied and present in the moment, all the while recognizing that nowhere on this earth is truly my “home”.
So here I go getting involved in connected with my church and other various programs in the local community…. being “home” where the Lord and I are at.